However, now I found out ...that wasn’t true.
Forgiving is good as it heals our body, soul, mind and spirit. But forgetting is optional and should only be done when failing to remember would put me at risk for harm of any kind. To do otherwise invites victimization and I certainly don’t want to get any nearer.
I need to protect myself...my dignity.
I've learnt that I could forgive whoever for what they did but to forget would be devastating.
You may wonder, “How do I know I’ve truly forgiven someone?
What does it look and feel like?”
The best response that I'm experiencing right now. .. is that I know I’ve forgiven someone when she have safe passage through my mind. Meaning, I can think of her and don’t have "fire-alarm responses" in my body.
To forgive doesn’t mean I condone or approve of what happened. Neither does it mean that I don’t wanna seek justice.
It simply means that I've decided to release myself from the emotional rollercoaster that negatively impacts my entire whole being.
Thinking about how I felt physically when I'm experiencing anger, fear, resentment, grief or sadness - all factors of unforgiveness. My body pumped chemicals into the system that research has shown, over time, can erode my immune system, impact my heart and blood pressure and actually caused me to gain weight.
I found out that forgiveness is something that people can learn to do but forgetting is a bit difficult.
Right now, She who hurted me may never know that I have forgiven her...
Am doing it for myself, not for her sake. Forgiving her gives me my life back and give return me to my family. Most importantly, I regain my self composure again instead of focusing my anger and waiting for the moment of revenge...!
I'm back to my normal self once again.
I may forgive but never will forget.
To this nasty woman ....be prepared to face God.
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